How To Approach A Bad Neighbor?

Discussion in 'Off Topic Forum' started by IcyBC, Sep 12, 2015.

  1. IcyBC

    IcyBC Well-Known Member

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    I think I have mentioned somewhere in this forum about one of my neighbors, who threw his left over foods to my yard for Capone to eat. I caught this act once, and I have confronted him to stop throwing his food over my yard.

    Yesterday, Capone found two T-bone steak bones and brought one of them to my driveway. I took it and threw it back into his yard. Then my son found one and threw it back too. He didn't throw those bones into my yard, but placed them close by the fence to find them.

    I am worried that one of these days, Capone will get his neck caught in the fence or choke to dead with those bones. My problem is I don't know what is the diplomatic way to deal with this annoying guy. I want this to stop! Any suggestions?
     
    IcyBC, Sep 12, 2015
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  2. IcyBC

    Trellum Well-Known Member

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    Oh yes, I think you mentioned this before, I had no idea the problem was so bad. So sorry to hear you are dealing with someone like that, but if h is indeed high most of the time... not sure there is a good way to approach him. Also, if you have already talked about this with him and he hasn't stopped, well, odds are he won't stop no matter what you say or do. I guess you just have to keep Capone indoors, and keep an eye on him when he is out, a very close eye. I know it sucks, but those people can be dangerous.
     
    Trellum, Sep 13, 2015
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  3. IcyBC

    IcyBC Well-Known Member

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    That's what I am worried about, and that is his erratic behavior! If this continue, I might have to file a complaint with the city about him leaving his left over food in the yard, or might have to do a police report. Here I think I have a fenced in backyard so my dog can be safe and has a bit of freedom. It is not so and it is really annoying.
     
    IcyBC, Sep 14, 2015
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  4. IcyBC

    Winterybella Well-Known Member

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    Well sometimes as nice as I am I am the one who likes to fix bad people. I get really pissed off about unreasonable people. The only thing that concerns me is the fact he has drug issues. Did I get that correctly?

    Even if he does, can't you ever catch him when you are your calmest and he might be at his and reason with him or is he beyond reason? I like to reason with people before I go in for the "kill" ( not literally). You don't want to see me when I get really mad. Still all know my bark is worse than my bite. Before you decided to call the authorities, try talking to him again would be my advice.
     
    Winterybella, Sep 14, 2015
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  5. IcyBC

    Trellum Well-Known Member

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    @IcyBC I now remember you mentioned this earlier, but I didn't think he was so disrespectful... I thought he did that in his yard. Since you have tried telling him nicely he should stop, maybe if you fill in a complaint that might help, but is he just renting? or is that is own home? If it's his... and he won't be leaving anytime soon I'd really think it twice... I've been in the middle of a feud that started like this... lasted years and it wasn't pretty. I was just a kid, but it was awful. I'm so sorry you don't have much of a choice :/
     
    Trellum, Sep 15, 2015
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  6. IcyBC

    IcyBC Well-Known Member

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    @Winterybella , I caught him in action and had nicely asking him to not throw food over my yard for Capone to eat. I explained to him that my dog has sensitive stomach and anything new will cause him to vomit. He was drunk like a skunk and told me that dogs would eat rats too. It is beginning to be like an endless nightmare.

    @Trellum I believe he rented this place and he often isn't home, which I am very happy. But when he is home, there would be loud music, drinking, and partying and then you can see left over foods right outside his side door, which is about 30 steps from my yard. Now that we have a dog, he either threw it to my yard, or purposely left them close enough to the fence for Capone to drag it over.
     
    IcyBC, Sep 16, 2015
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  7. IcyBC

    Trellum Well-Known Member

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    @IcyBC Maybe you should talk about it again? Maybe he is so stoned all the time he often forgets things? Maybe he only needs a kind reminder? Have you tried to approach him in a very nice way, telling him how you need to control what your dog eats? Maybe make a peace offering? I've tried that method with troublesome neighbors, sometimes it works.
     
    Trellum, Sep 16, 2015
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  8. IcyBC

    IcyBC Well-Known Member

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    @Winterybella and @Trellum I will take your advice and will try to talk to him again soon when he is home. I will be kindly telling him also that if anything happens to my dog, he will be financially responsible for it, and if I see my dog getting a hold of his left over food, I will file a complaint with the police.
     
    IcyBC, Sep 17, 2015
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  9. IcyBC

    Trellum Well-Known Member

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    @IcyBC Good, but try to do it in a very calm and assertive tone, how old is your oldest son? If he is old enough you should take him with you. Sometimes those people find it hard to take a woman seriously (I know his type), but if you have a man around it might be a bit different. Just be assertive, and don't hesitate. Be careful about your body language, try to portray a lot security, look at him in the eye, and say everything in a very calm tone, try not to sound angry.
     
    Trellum, Sep 17, 2015
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  10. IcyBC

    Winterybella Well-Known Member

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    I think you have a good plan and Trellum makes some good points as well. I think it is important to do the right things even if you get the wrong result. Get the wrong result and take it to the authorities. I hope it turns out well.
     
    Winterybella, Sep 17, 2015
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  11. IcyBC

    IcyBC Well-Known Member

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    My oldest son is working on a cruiseship away from home, and the youngest one is only 16. He has on occasions yelled at the guy for teasing and taunting Capone when he let his dog out to do business. If I have the money, I would up tall wooden fence so I wouldn't have to see what's going on in his yard, and he can't see us!
     
    IcyBC, Sep 20, 2015
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  12. IcyBC

    Trellum Well-Known Member

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    Damn :( Well, at least your youngest son has showed he is not afraid of him :) That is very good, but yeah, if you could up that fence that would be ideal! That way you won't become sworn enemies or something like that. I'd not like that to happen, because I lived it as a kid :( My parents had problems with the neighbors as well, wasn't pretty at.
     
    Trellum, Sep 20, 2015
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  13. IcyBC

    IcyBC Well-Known Member

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    We have avoided this guy for years now, and only talked to him when it is absolutely necessary because of his behavior and personality. I don't want conflict for fear of reprisal but there are things that needed to clear up.

    Since the house he lives in is a rental house, we had to put up with some very crazy people over the years already, so he is just another and hopefully, he would move soon :(
     
    IcyBC, Sep 23, 2015
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  14. IcyBC

    Trellum Well-Known Member

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    @IcyBC I will be living right in the middle of two rental houses, both of my neighbors grow weed in their yard, but in the Netherlands that is kinda legal. So you can imagine! I wish you the best of luck with this guy! I hope he leaves soon as you said, hopefully a nice family can buy that house! This is what I hate of living in a neighborhood with so many rental houses...
     
    Trellum, Sep 23, 2015
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  15. IcyBC

    Winterybella Well-Known Member

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    For a long time I lived free of a lot of neighbors but as time has passed more and more people have come to the area. I only have neighbour in the true sense of the word and she doesn't bother my dogs or me. I just feel bad about the neighbour some houses down the road that allows he dogs to come bother mine in the wee hours of the morning. It's disruptive for everyone in the area. I want to confront him, but I hear he has a few screws loose.

    I hope this matter is resolved peacefully IcyBC.
     
    Winterybella, Sep 23, 2015
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  16. IcyBC

    IcyBC Well-Known Member

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    @Trellum and @Winterybella I live smack in the city so we don't have many choices here. Both sides of my house are rental houses and they don't usually take care of the properties. The one on my left is a bit more pleasant to deal with and they kept to themselves; but the guy on right side is like a walking nightmare.
     
    IcyBC, Sep 25, 2015
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  17. IcyBC

    Trellum Well-Known Member

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    @IcyBC Damn :( I really hope he moves out! I can't imagine having to live next to someone who is so disruptive! My mom has had some issues with her current neighbors, but they managed to solve things. It must be so hard having to live with someone who is just awful :( It seems you guys have tried everything in the book of the good neighbor.
     
    Trellum, Sep 27, 2015
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  18. IcyBC

    IcyBC Well-Known Member

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    My method is trying to avoid him as much as possible! He is high most of the time and drunk like a skunk! When my son has friends over for a camp fire, he taunted them too, and I had to come out to ask him to leave them alone, but he won't stop, so the boys decided to just come inside. We can't even be outside when he is around :(
     
    IcyBC, Sep 27, 2015
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  19. IcyBC

    Trellum Well-Known Member

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    @IcyBC That's just too awful! Poor kids, they should be free whatever they feel like doing in their own yard! I feel so bad for you and your son! I hope that guy leaves! But I understand why you avoid that man, those people can get really dangerous. Do you think he does meth? or just weed? maybe coke? I don't wish any kind of bad thing on anyone, but let me tell you something... I've seen this... that lifestyle always ends up catching up with that people. Doesn't matter how young they are, it's always the same. By the way, he is also like that when he is not high and drunk? Drugs and alcohol turn you into a very different person.
     
    Trellum, Sep 29, 2015
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  20. IcyBC

    Winterybella Well-Known Member

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    Oh dear. You have a bigger problem than with Capone. It extends to the kids being forced to stay out of his way. That's not cool. I am quite the perfect neighbour but I remember getting into a brawl of sorts with a guy who wanted to kick my dogs for pooping on his land although I had a bag to pick it up. I honestly went into 'gangster' mode, I was afraid of myself. I would not want that to happen to you.
     
    Winterybella, Sep 29, 2015
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